Drained {Down the Rabbit Hole}

I feel so drained lately, I have no energy, no motivation.

Feeling as though I'm failing everything. Just when I think I'm getting on a good path, getting it together. It crumbles.

Part of me feels like my psychiatrist has given up on me. After trying to up my prozac he has suddenly stopped. Basically admitted that it sounds like I have a personality disorder but left me on the medicine that I feel isn't helping at all. My therapist keeps saying I'm doing good with all that is going on. But honestly I'm not.

They see me on relatively good days.

They don't see me on the bad days.

They don't see me when I'm clawing into my arm cause I'm crying and upset and feeling like a complete failure. Sometimes I'm smoking about a pack a day.

Life get hard to live on certain days, I push through for my kids but it hurts. 



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Immortalize Popping the Question in Print

Why Not Pop the Question in Print?

(sponsored post)




Some proposals happen on a mountain top. Some happen while she's brushing her teeth. Whether you prefer the extravagant or the subtle, you are going to want to commemorate this milestone of life. That's why the idea of publishing a proposal into a printed Blurb's book is so appealing. Here are a few ideas of how to craft the most creative "Will You Marry Me?" chronicle.

  • Write a children's book where the main characters are you and your beloved. Print the book with Blurb's, then have it put onto the shelves at your local library. Take her on a reading date and "stumble" across the book. (Just remind her that you're in the library and she'll have to tone down those shrieks of joy.)

  • Create a beautiful photo essay of your relationship. Include photos of where you met, special pieces from your first date, scenes from your favorite events. Use the pictures to tell a silent story of your love and then complete this happy ending with a picture of you and a sign asking for her hand.

  • Is your beloved a foodie? Make her a Blurb's cookbook of love! Ask your family and friends for their favorite recipes and put them together into one book, complete with pictures. Add in your own recipe of love with ingredients that include moments from your courtship. Just be sure that when the relationship is fully baked, you ask about the final course - a lifetime of sweet memories.

Blurb's loves helping people to publish their dreams and right now they are offering two special deals to get your proposal in print.  Save 15% on all purchases by using promo code: AUGUST15 at checkout. Save 25% on print book orders of $75+ on 1st purchase only, when you use promo code: TRYOUT at checkout.

Both of these offers expire on August 25th, so don't wait to publish the most important question ever put into print, with Blurb.


This is a sponsored post, containing affiliate links.

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Making Iced Coffee

What is the best thing about summer weather? Iced Coffee. 


At least for me. I love a nice cold cup of iced coffee on a hot day. It's so nice. I used to use my French Press to make iced coffee, add grounds plus water stir press and chill in the fridge. But I found this neat little recipe on Starbucks for a Pour Over Brewer. I figured I would share it with you guys.

  • First thing it tells you is getting the right grounds. They recommend a fine ground, looking like sugar. I like to use a dark roast for iced coffee. Remember when making iced coffee you need to double the amount of grounds cause it will get watered down with the ice.



  • Then they recommend pouring only until the cone is half full and waiting 10 seconds or so for the coffee to start to drip. Then finishing the pour.



  • When done remove the cone, the pitcher should be half full at this point. Add ice and enjoy! (ice cream optional.)



This post has affiliate links, meaning I will earn some money if you follow my advice and purchase these products. All opinions are my own.

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Shock #MermaidMonday

via devaintART
What just happened?
How did I get here?
What is happening?

I feel frozen
Cold
Alone

My skin is tingling
My heart is racing

The water seems so calm
But still
I know deep there are secrets

How do I know?
Where have I been?

Down the faery path I traveled
Upon the waters I came

This is not where I started
Not where I left

The waters they called me
They shimmered in the moonlight

Did I jump in?
Was I already in?

I remember....

Remember a tail...

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Snack Time at the Wherehouse




The Wherehouse is a great restaurant here in Newburgh. Slightly bias since I did work for the owner last year on the Zombie BBQ. Me and the kids were going to stop by Caffe Macchiato but it was closed when we got there, so we walked down Liberty St a little bit and got some sodas and hand cut shoestring fries! It was fun, the kids loved it, especially the records on the cellar.

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This Boy


My boy, my love, my monster (don't worry it's a family thing). I love him to death, even if he is driving me up a wall. He will forever be my baby boy, even when he is grown and has his own family.

This Boy.


Can make me smile even on my worse day. Make my heart melt with a little hug. Make my blood boil even though I know he is just being a mini me.

This Boy.


Makes everyday of life worth living. (So does my daughter but this post is about my boy.) Makes me want to fight when I see something wrong. Makes me proud when he shows compassion.

This Boy.


Is smart. Independent. Compassionate. Sweet. Hyper. Loving. Full of energy. Excited for life.

My Boy.


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9 Things I Would Rather Be Doing

Today I am halfway between sick and better. I'm also baby sitting. But at least it's not too hot outside and I'm trying to get some work done on the porch while the kids play. But what would I rather be doing today? I know you're dying to know.



9. Watching Maleficent! (Yes I still haven't seen this movie)
8. Drinking a Venti Iced Vanilla Soy Quad Latte and reading a book
7. Shopping for some clothes! One I've lost weight Two I need clothes 
6. Getting my mermaid scales worked on
5. Model shooting for an upcoming project 
4. Doing a SG set with RennieCat
3. Sleeping! Gotta make those antibodies
2. Going to Splash Down! 

And the number one thing I rather be doing?


Going to the beach!


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Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Been changing some things around, updating my about page and hire me page. Brand new contact me page.

And.... I got rid of my ads. Why? To be honest they weren't doing much besides giving me a headache trying to make my little site look nice. Does this mean I'm giving up on advertising? Nope.

What I am going to do is offer up ad spots for my fellow bloggers! I'm going to work out the details and figure out the pricing and such. But I decided I would much rather use that space for my blogging family, than for a company that doesn't know me.

Email me if you are interested in getting one of my first ad spots! faeriebarista@gmail.com

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